I don’t think I’ve had a cigarette in at least a year but maybe one regular sized one here and there but nothing gave me the “hooked” feeling like the one I had today. I know they’re unhealthy and usually I feel and smell gross after. But today…
- was it the timing and setting?
- was it because it was a skinny cigarette with my favourite menthol button?
Probably a bit of both but I better not become addicted because I’m already thinking about when I’ll have one next and that is within the next few hours at work.
My colleague offered me one after lunch today and I said yes because the skinny cig was too cute to say no to. I’ve also been quite irritated and stagnated lately (what’s new, eh) with my relationships and work and having my male colleague provide his reality check perspective really made the smoke a tasty good one. What really stood out from what he said was the harsh reality that women lose value over time as men gain value. But as long as you believe in your value then nothing else matters right?
When I suffered my break-up half a year ago, many people reassure me with the fact that I am still young. In the back of my head, that statement worries me because will they say the same thing if I were beyond my late 20s? As much as I believe in my value, the majority of society lives in this conspiracy world of lip fillers, big butts, fake tits, and 9-5 slavery with terrible aggravating traffic stresses. The more I get exposed to these concepts, the more I get tempted to conform.
All this because of one smoke? OH DEAR…
But there’s more.
“Women fall in love with what they hear
Men fall in love with what they see
That’s why women wear make-up and men lie”
I’ve heard of a saying somewhere that there are no ugly women in this world but only lazy ones.
Basically what my colleague told me a second time, which I’ve heard the first time from my very own sister is summarized in the above quote.
Well, I guess it’s time to come up with my New Year’s Resolutions while listening to my new found favourite song called SUPERGIRL.